alycewilson (alycewilson) wrote,
alycewilson
alycewilson

NaPoWriMo 29: To Those Who Didn't Love Me Back

My second poem for today is an epistolary poem, based on the prompt from Wild Violet: NAPOWRIMO 2020 - Prompt 29.




chalk-hearts

Chalk hearts on a sidewalk



To Those Who Didn't Love Me Back

Funny, how clear now, the reasons.
Disconnects, awkward timing,
my fumbling, fervent attempts.
Never smooth, I lurched
too soon into adulation. Clutching
a script I'd written for how
fondness should unfurl. It took me
years to realize my blunders,
only to cringe in retrospect
at flubs and gaffes --
confessions, misinterpretations,
brazenly shoving
my heart at you, expecting
what? I doubt I even knew.

Infatuation, its own obsession,
spurring me on to long
again and again for
unattainable communion.
Because as long as you remained
remote, I didn't have to fathom
futures. Or chassé forward
to the next mating-dance
step. For real love
spooked my senses,
so sparse until
I finally stumbled upon it,
while no longer looking.

- April 29, 2020
Tags: love, napowrimo, napowrimo 2020, poetry
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